MOTOR OIL
page 2 QUINCE I’m not sure if that answers my question. BILLY Oh. Right. Sorry. Chopping a tree, that’s usually fine. But when you need to get the stump out, you know, that’s a whole other problem. You got root systems that dig in. They’re all down there hanging on for dear life, searching for water and soil and nutrients. Pulling up a stump by the roots, that’s a big-ass job. QUINCE Uh-huh. BILLY That’s like a tractor or pick-up truck with chains job. You know, that’s probably where that phrase came from, you know? “Rooted.” You hear a word like that, something being “rooted” and you know it’s something dug in. That’s going to be hard to move. QUINCE That’s what “rooted” means? BILLY That’s what it means to me. QUINCE I see. BILLY So, I hit on this idea a couple years back. Pour down a bunch of motor oil, and wait for the tree to die. In a few weeks those roots are a whole lot less tenacious, know what I mean? QUINCE And then nothing grows here for how long? BILLY Depends on how much motor oil. But, I’d say about seven to ten years. QUINCE I’m sorry to seem a little dense. BILLY No problem at all. I didn’t even notice. QUINCE But, why– BILLY Which maybe makes me the dense one, right? QUINCE I’m not sure if– BILLY I mean, here you are apologizing for being dense, I didn’t notice you were, so who’s being dense, you or me? QUINCE I’m not sure. BILLY Well, then maybe it is you, huh? QUINCE Can I ask my question? BILLY Lady. I wish you would. |